Wednesday, January 14, 2009

Marcus Shrenker: How Can Such A Coward Have Such Balls?

The story of Marcus Shrenker is fascinating. Staging your own death to try to slip out the back door and try on a new life when you've fucked up the one you've got isn't a new idea. Lots of people have tried, and I'm sure plenty have pulled a fast one. But it's 2009. Hijinks like that aren't likely to succeed, what with everything being traced, tracked and recorded.

Faking your death to avoid legal, financial, social and personal troubles may not be an original solution, but Shrenker gets credit for a ballsy attempt. The whole thing makes me wonder, though, what kind of asshole does that? What was his plan? What was he going to do, mosey out to the wild west and put his stakes down on a homestead? Take a wife and work the land under an assumed name? Forge a new identity? How exactly was he going to pull it off?

While perhaps attractive to those who are as delusional as they are dedicated to their own survival, faking your own death looks like a bureaucratic nightmare. The people who go that route probably spent inordinate amounts of time and energy cheating on tests or plagiarizing term papers when they were in school. While it always seemed like more effort than it was worth, constructing elaborate schemes to cheat on homework and tests, cheating certainly doesn't require the nerve or the crazy it takes to jump out of a plane, ask the 5-0 for assistance a few hundred miles away from your crash site, go on the lam and slice up your wrists at the local KOA all in a pathetic attempt to avoid being a man and facing consequences.

What a fucking tool.

2 comments:

themanwithaplan said...

honestly i think your a fucking pussy. you think your hard because you post your opinion. well god hates you just like everyone else bitch

samepersonasabove;) said...

the only real tool is you. i bet you wrote this and told all your little butt fucker friends to go read what you wrote. it doesnt make you any higher in society to get a laugh. pussypussypussypussy